Disposal /Disposition

Years ago, I enjoyed a hilarious bit by a stand-up comic on the impossibility of getting rid of a worn out garbage can.  No matter what he tried or how it was labeled, the garbage collectors consistently returned it to his curb.

Disposal of human remains is at least as complicated, but it is something we (or at least our heirs) will eventually have to deal with.  Acceptable choices seem to be limited to burial  at land or sea, cremation, or some combination of the above.  I suppose that you could opt to donate your body to science, and let the laboratory, medical school, or whatever worry about what to do with the unwanted parts.  Back in the ‘80s, there was even a movement that urged you to to have your body separated into its various elements via destructive distillation, but the movement never got off the ground.

I was always attracted to George Carlin’s solution – he said that when he died, he wanted to be placed on a big pile of explosives and blown up.  It didn't happen, by the way, but probably should have.

The latest trend is “Green” burial.  Especially for the environmentally conscious who feel guilty for destroying the planet by walking around exhaling CO2, and  wish to avoid polluting the planet any further after their death.

The Natural Burial Co-op, doesn’t list a physical address on their website, but seems to be Canada based.  They do list some affiliates in the USA, including one facility, the Ethecian Family Burial Ground, just up the road a ways in San Jacinto County near Lake Livingston.

The “greenest” of the green options seems to be offered by Promessa, a group founded in Sweden and now in business in the UK.  I can’t find an American company offering their services, but it seems like a good business opportunity. 

Basically, Promessa offers to dip your cadaver in liquid nitrogen to make it extremely brittle, then use sound waves to vibrate your remains to a fine powder which could then be buried in a cornstarch-based cardboard box.  From their own website:

The promession process

• The body is frozen to minus 18 degrees Celsius and then exposed in liquid nitrogen.
• This makes the body fragile.
• It is then vibrated which causes it to break down into an organic powder.
• Then it is introduced into a vacuum chamber where the water is evaporated.
• The now dry powder passes through a metal separator where any metals and mercury are removed.
• The remains are now ready to be laid in a biodegradeable coffin.
• The coffin is then buried in the living topsoil.
• As a result the coffin and its contents turn into compost in about 6-12 months.
• A bush or tree can be planted above the coffin.
• The compost formed can then be taken up by the plant, which can instill greater insight and respect for the ecological cycle.
• The plant stands as a symbol of the deceased.

My own American Indian ancestors, and numerous other societies used to have a tradition of just wandering off to die.  I’ll admit that population density might make that more difficult today, but I believe it is still doable, and might be a preferable alternative.

The Promessa website boasts of the awards they’ve won from other Green groups.  They don’t list prices, but they do attempt to make their process as attractive as possible, falling just short of promising to put the fun back in funerals.  Still, this promession thing does give a whole new meaning to the phrase “Dust to dust.”