Thursday, May 31, 2018

Hot



We have certainly had an interesting year, weather-wise.  
The first few months were exceptionally cold, and May has done its best to make up for it. 
Today will be the 20th day this month with a high above 90⁰- the most 90 plus days of any May on record.
That doesn't make it the hottest May in Houston history - that record uses the day's average temperature to make the calculation. That dubious honor goes to 1996, with an average temp of 81.4⁰ - looks like this year will come in third.

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Grande



I normally don't approve of making fun of anyone's name, but this morning one of my Facebook friends, an old newspaper publisher, said that he thought Ariana Grande was a type font.
He got several other suggestions, including:
  • A branch of the Rio Grand
  • A kinky sex practice
  • An extra large portion at a Mexican restaurant
  • The latest offering at Starbucks

Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Nothing....But

I had thought about and discarded several topics for my blog today.  I really didn't have anything I wanted to say.  
I finally decided to just say so, then I discovered that I had lost internet connection.
If there is anything more frustrating than having nothing to say it is not having the means to say it.

Monday, May 28, 2018

Half Staff

Did you know that federal guidelines (Public Law 94-344, known as the Federal Flag Code, contains rules for handling and displaying the U.S. flag) say that the flag should only be displayed at half staff until noon on Memorial Day.
I certainly did not.
I wonder if that rule is followed anywhere, and if there is a ceremony or procedure for raising the flag from half mast to the top of the pole.

Sunday, May 27, 2018

The Dogs and Their Chair

Our dogs have their own chair, and they spend most of the day in it.
Recently, because of her vision loss, weight gain and just old age (They'll turn 14 this summer) Dusty can no longer jump into the chair like she used to.
I first tried putting a box on the floor to use as a step, but she wouldn't get on it.  Then I got the idea of wiring the footrest in a partially open position to act as a sort of a ramp. Now, if I sit in the chair and call her, she can and will run right up it into my lap.  
But - Will she use it to get into the chair on her own?  
Oh, Hell no! 
She sits on the floor and whines, barks or just stares at us until one of us picks her up and puts her in the chair.
I'd guess you'd say she has us trained.

Saturday, May 26, 2018

Slack

My darling wife is sweet and loving, a caring person who is quick to make friends, but she is not one who is likely to cut you any slack.  
She once had the director of labs at Hermann Hospital tell her that she was the best manager she ever had, but that she thanked God that she never had to work for her.
Actually, her rules were pretty simple:
  • Never call in sick.
  • If you're not 10 minutes early, you're late.
  • Lab tests can mean life or death - never report results you're not sure are right.
  • Never make excuses - own your mistakes, find them and fix them.
This attitude carries over into hour daily lives in a multitude of ways.  For example, we have a 30 year old magnolia tree that has never bloomed, and Honey has been after me for years to cut it down.  I'm actually surprised that she hasn't done it herself.
It even extends to baseball.
It doesn't matter that Dallas Keuchel's current ERA at 3.39 is better than his career average of 3.63, or that he would top the starting pitching lineup on almost any other team in the majors - when he gave up two runs to the Indians last night, Honey was ready to send him down to Triple-A.

Friday, May 25, 2018

Alien Gear

My daughter, Cheryl, got me a holster for a late Christmas present.  Actually, she got me a Shapeshifter Starter Kit from Alien Gear -a modular rig that allows me to carry my pistol in any one of four different configurations.
When you first open the box, it's a little disconcerting - there are about 100 parts in there - but there are excellent instructions and on line videos that make assembly easy.
The only thing I haven't figured out yet is why they include four 2 inch screws and four drywall anchors.

Thursday, May 24, 2018

Kneelers

After two years of controversy and declining ratings, the NFL announced a new policy on kneeling yesterday.  
Anyone on the field at the time of the National Anthem will be required to stand.  Anyone who does not wish to stand should remain in the locker room until the Anthem is over, and will not be penalized for doing so.  Any team whose players flaunt this rule will be fined, and the fine can be passed by the team to the player(s).
This must be a pretty good compromise - it's already getting lots of complaints.

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

Prayers Needed?

One of the things that annoys me about Facebook - There are several, but this one really gets my goat - is how often I see posts like the one above; somebody asking for prayers, but offering no explanation whatsoever as to the circumstances that led to the request.
Why all the mystery?  
If it's none of my business, am I really the one you should be asking for prayers?
Don't you think that prayers might be just a little more effective if we had some idea who or what we're praying for?
I will try to be supportive, but it is literally like taking a metaphysical shot in the dark.

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Why She Did It

You may have seen this picture - it was all over social media recently:
That is Kaitlin Bennett.  
She recently graduated from Kent State University with a degree in biology.  The next day, she returned to the campus openly carrying an AR-10, and a mortar board cap with the words "Come and take it" on the top.
She explained that her action was a protest designed to display the absurdity of the schools rules about firearms.  As a student, she was prohibited from possessing a firearm on campus, but, as a guest, she is allowed to carry.  In fact, she had a school security officer accompany her on the photo shoot.

Monday, May 21, 2018

Toy Hauler

We went next door to see the Graff's new toy hauler yesterday.  All I can say is wow - even the whistles and bells on this thing have whistles and bells.  
It is one sweet 5th wheel.
The only bad thing about it is that it puts them one step closer to moving away.  They have been the kind of neighbors everyone hopes for but seldom gets.  To say that we'll miss them is an understatement.

Saturday, May 19, 2018

Santa Fe

Local news - in fact just about all local programming yesterday - was dedicated to the coverage of the deadly shootings at Santa Fe High School.  As I write this, it is not even the latest in the series of school shootings - there was a shooting at a graduation ceremony in Georgia last night.
Everybody agrees that school shootings are bad, but nobody has offered a viable plan to stop them.  
I'm not sure there is one.
Having attended high school in Alvin, I have some fond memories of Santa Fe.  Brazoria County was mostly dry back then, and Santa Fe was just over the county line in Galveston County where the rule was anything goes.  We also occasionally attended dances in Santa Fe because everyone from Alvin knew  that those Santa Fe girls were easy.
Things have changed, but not for the better.

Friday, May 18, 2018

Doing It All Wrong

As I've mentioned before, Honey walks about five mornings a week, while I walk less often and fewer miles.  She does about five miles a day - I usually walk about a half mile.
Yesterday, she told me that I shouldn't be concentrating on distance, but on the amount of time I walk.  She said that when I do walk, I walk too fast - I do that half mile in about eight or nine minutes.  She told me to ignore the miles and concentrate walking for a longer period of time, building the time up a minute or so at a time.
I tried it this morning.  
I walked for fifteen minutes (Honey walks for about an hour and forty/forty five) straight.  I actually didn't get any farther, but I did feel more tired when I got home.  That seems counterintuitive, but I think it was mostly because I hadn't walked at all in a couple of weeks.

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Dan

Honey and I went to Crosby and voted early in the Republican Primary Run-off.  
At first, I didn't think it mattered much.  
The choice was between a long time Republican politician who hadn't done much, if any, damage as a State Representative, and a newcomer who is a certified American hero.  Then the powers behind Kevin Roberts began an unprecedented character assassination attack on Crenshaw.
I can only hope there are enough voters who were as offended by this as I am.

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

O-I-C

Those who follow this blog know that my wife, Honey, recently had cataract surgery after wearing glasses for over 60 years.  The results were remarkable - her vision is now 20/20 in both eyes, although she will need glasses to read.
The cheap reading glasses we bought never seem to be handy when she needs them, which can be aggravating for someone who has always had her glasses right there on her face.  
We may have solved that problem yesterday - she ordered new progressive eyeglasses that go from no correction at all to her reading prescription.  She won't have to wear them all the time, but she can if she wants to.
Conversely, she often finds herself reaching up to remove glasses that aren't there, and the first time she stepped into the shower and could see, she had a moment of panic thinking she had got in the shower with her glasses on.
She had an event yesterday morning that illustrates  how much things have changed.  While on her morning walk, she called out to a neighbor who was sitting on her porch.  The lady said "I guess your surgery was a success."
Honey said that it was, and asked why she thought so, to which she replied, "I'm out here on my porch every morning when you walk by, and this is the first time you have ever seen me here."

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Wait....For....It

I can't say I wasn't warned.  
I got a pop-up yesterday saying that the Windows 10 April Upgrade was ready to load on my computer. It warned that it was larger than usual, and gave me the option of doing it immediately or later.  I chose later, and this morning it took 25 minutes for my laptop to get to a point where I could actually use it.
Once it did, it looks pretty much the same, but there were several tutorials that I chose to ignore.

Monday, May 14, 2018

Blue Box

That's a picture of what used to be known as a blue box.  I suppose one of the first ones may have been blue, and it may have actually come in a box.
This one uses a Datamath calculator from Texas Instruments, and a speaker sitting over the mouthpiece of the handset to send dialing frequency tones. 
We used them in the early days of fax to access numbers that broadcast a on kilohertz tone for testing purposes.   They could also access number that would let you call long distance for free - of course, we never did that.

Sunday, May 13, 2018

Mother's Day Memory

My mother was petite and attractive - several of my classmates from elementary through high school described her as hot, which was something I thought was neat but a little creepy. 
She claimed to be five feet and 3/4 of an inch tall, but I'm pretty sure at least 1/2 inch of that was wishful thinking.
When I was in eighth grade at Hamilton Jr. High, she would drop me off at school on the way to work, and I would ride the bus home.  One day, when she arrived at work she saw that I had left my lunch in the car, so she went back to the school, found a place to park, and brought my lunch in.  This was about fifty years before schools had metal detectors and all visitors were required to report to the principal's office before proceeding.
She was stopped in the hall by a male science teacher who demanded to see her hall pass.  She explained that she was not a student, but he wasn't buying it.  He said she might be too old to be a student, but there was no way she could have a son in Jr. High.
He took her to the principal's office, where the assistant principal broke into laughter.
He told the teacher that if he had ever attended a meeting, he would know that he had just busted the president of the Hamilton P.T.A.

Saturday, May 12, 2018

Achmed

When Achmed the terrorist woke in heaven that day
He could not think of a thing to say
72 virgins were at hand
Nubile young beauties, all at his command
But the damn bomb had blown his manhood away

Friday, May 11, 2018

On a Lighter Subject

One of the most dependable products on the market is the Bic lighter.  Bics seem to work consistently until they run out of butane and then they don't - one time it will light and then never again.
Lately, we have been using a red Bic that should have given up the ghost several weeks ago, but it keeps on lighting every time.  I was thinking about that last night, and it brought to mind Man from the South, easily one of the creepiest and most memorable episodes of Alfred Hitchcock Presents.
Based on a short story by Raoul Dahl, Steve McQueen brags to a girl he just met in a Las Vegas bar that his Zippo lights every time.  Peter Lorre overhears and offers to bet him it won't light ten times in a row.  
The bet - Lorre's brand new convertible against McQueen's little finger.
Without giving the whole thing away, I can say that there is a typical Hitchcock twist. 
I can also bet that if you saw it when it first aired in 1960 or in later re-runs, it is a show you still remember - one you will never forget.

Thursday, May 10, 2018

Decisions, Decisions

We went to the chiropractor yesterday.  Honey felt like she needed an adjustment, but mine was more basic maintenance, really just because I was there.  Even so, I was surprised at how much my back cracked and popped.
Today, I need to mow the yard, but I know that an hour or so bouncing around the yard on the mower will undo any benefit I got from visiting the chiropractor yesterday. 
It's a quandary. 
Still, if that's the toughest decision I have to face today, life is pretty good.

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

Brer Rabbit

For some reason, we haven't had any rabbits here at the old Boggy Thicket for years.  I don't know why - we have plenty of birds, a gazillion squirrels, occasional deer, and even a family of foxes in our woods, but no rabbits.
Last week, Honey saw one between the fence and the barn, but it was gone before I came outside.  Then yesterday, I saw one in our side yard.  I watched him (her?) for several minutes as it grazed on weeds, then it ran into our big azalea bed and disappeared.
Like the briar patch in the Uncle Remus story, that azalea bed is a perfect hiding place.  That rabbit could have been living there for years and we would never know.

Monday, May 7, 2018

T R D

There are things that can never be unseen, and some that can never be unheard.
Years ago, when I was a technical trainer at IKON, one of our techs showed up one morning with a brand new truck.  It was a top-of-the-line sports model from Toyota with all the whistles and bells - a beautiful truck that proudly displayed the TRD (Toyota Racing Development) emblem on the rear quarter panel.
When he went out to see the truck, Greg Garrison took one look at that emblem and said, "You bought yourself a turd?"
I have never been able to see that emblem since without thinking about that, and, now that I've told you, I'll bet you never will either.

Sunday, May 6, 2018

Flow


There’s no need, they say, to strain your brain

Just “Go with the flow” is the current refrain

But, why I don’t know

Should I go with the flow,

When the flow is slowly circling the drain?

Saturday, May 5, 2018

Cinco de Mayo

Today we celebrate Cinco de Mayo, which commemorates a minor victory against the French (the battle of Puebla) in a war that Mexico eventually lost.
It's actually more of a celebration of brilliant marketing, as thousands of Americans consume gallons of Mexican beer and tequila.

Thursday, May 3, 2018

Gardenia

We have a bed of Gardenias along the front of our house. 
Years ago, when we had our house leveled, the crew dug up several when they were placing pilings.  Most were replanted once they were through, but one never made it.  I saw it a week or so later, lying out in the yard.  Its roots were bare and dried, and I figured it was dead.
I threw it and some grass clippings on a trash pile behind the barn and forgot about it.
Today, that "dead" bush is over eight feet in diameter and taller than the barn.  It is covered with buds that are just beginning to open, and it smells wonderful.

Wednesday, May 2, 2018

Now What?

As I reported back in March, we had several Amaryllis blooms this Spring. 
This year, for the first time ever, one of them has been successfully pollinated. After the blooms dropped, the other stalks all wilted and fell to the ground, but this one  seems to be bearing fruit.
I would like to use this to start another plant, but I don't have a clue as to how to go about it. 
Do I pick it and plant it? 
Do I just leave it alone and let nature take its course? 
For any horticulturists out there, your advice would be appreciated.

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

Hate Speech


Practically every entry on my Facebook page today is followed by a little poll asking "Does this post contain hate speech?
What's up with that?
Some of the posts I see are annoying as Hell, but seldom, if ever, do I see something that qualifies as HATE SPEECH.
Just the implication - asking after every post and comment -comes very close to putting Facebook in the hate speech category.
Does this post contain hate speech?